Have you ever had a realistic dream? When you confuse your dreams with reality but then you wake up and realize it’s all in your head? That was me a couple nights ago. I usually don’t dream and If I dream I never recall them. I’m glad but sometimes I remember them. Most dreams I remember are more nightmares than dreams because it’s always something I wake up from. It leaves me wanting nothing to do with my thoughts.
My dream was about someone that I once was in love with and someone I am still fond about. It’s weird I’ve never has something so realistic. (and no I didn’t dream we were having sex!) It was bittersweet. He moved on with someone else and I was happy for him like I am right now. Where ever he is I hope that he finds what he is searching for. In my dream I was happy but I was pained with the sadness of what could have been. The best part of the dream was that I achieved my life goals, which is great. Somehow I feel that this dream was a message that it’s okay for me to move on from him. In a way I’m giving up being with him to achieve my own ambitions.
I never thought that I would be the one to not want to get married. My whole childhood I fantasized about be married and having children. Now that I’m at that age, I find myself not interested in marriage or kids anymore. After all the things I’ve been through, the one thing I learned is that you can only truly depend on yourself. At the end of the day, you realize no one is obligated to love you or take care of you. You have to love and take care of yourself before anyone else. Sometimes before your own dreams. I’ve had some tough mistakes in the past that I used to regret but now I’ve learned to accept them. So having a dream about someone I love moving on and being happy. It’s more than I could ever hope.
-With Love, Yume